After his long stint from
being away from the game
of golf, Tiger Woods is
ready to return to the golf
course for the Masters.
But he has been working
on his game while he was
away, and he was spotted
at the Bucks campus.
Woods has had such a
crazy start to the New Year,
starting back in last
November when he
crashed his car while
pulling out of his own
driveway. Then Woods was
sent to sex rehab after
admitting to having sexual
relations with various
women.
He has come out and
apologized to everyone he
hurt. Last week Woods
announced his return to pro
golf, and he is scheduled
to return to this year’s
Masters from April 5-11 at
Augusta National golf club.
To get himself prepared
for the Masters Woods has
been spending time around
the Newtown campus
under heavy guard, practicing
with the golf team.
Woods has been teaching
the team some new golf
moves, and how having
large 9 irons can help you
with the ladies.
Woods has been told not
to come in contact with
any of the girls on campus,
and to keep his putter in
his pants. Woods will be
looking for Bucks to
become one of his new
sponsors. The school has
said it will agree only if
Woods wears a Bucks tshirt
while playing in the
Masters.
Woods arrives at Bucks
everyday around 4 p.m. He
doesn’t drive himself to the
campus because he is
afraid of backing into one
of the beautiful trees located
around the campus.
Woods has his driver bring
him everyday to the back
of the gym’s entrance so he
can get in without anyone
noticing him.
Woods then meets the
team on the practice field
to get some practice swings
in and to work on his driving.
Woods seems to be
having a good time working
with the Bucks golf
team, giving the team
pointers for their opening
match against Burlington
County.
Woods is expected to play
with the team in their first
match; to do so he will
have to pass himself off as
a college student.
Woods has picked out a
disguise and a fake name
so he will not draw much
attention. He will be playing
under the name Charlie
Sheen, which is very
strange because Sheen has
also had problems with
being in sex rehab; it’s a
pretty bold move by Tiger
but we’ll see how it pans
out for the golf champ.
Even though the Masters
begins the same day as the
Bucks golf team begins
their season, Woods will
compete with Bucks first
and has ordered the PGA to
hold off starting his match
until he arrives. If the PGA
is smart they should listen
to Woods if they want to
make some money.
Remember to come out
and watch the Bucks golf
team with their special
enforcer Tiger Woods, oops
I mean Charlie Sheen,
playing Burlington County
on April 5 at 1 p.m. here at
Bucks. Then go home and
catch Tiger Woods make
his comeback to pro golf at
the Masters from April 5-
11.